On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I need to stop coming to work sober
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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