this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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