No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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