My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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