ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I just forgot I was standing up.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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