im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
