we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
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