if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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