WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
