I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
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