she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize