No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
