I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
