Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Boobs are out for the taking
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
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