i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
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