Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
