How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Randomize
