not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
