I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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