come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Randomize
