Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Randomize
