Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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