I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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