East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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