Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Randomize
