On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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