trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
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