One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
