You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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