Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i was born a porn star she said
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
