listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
how drunk are you?
Several
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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