The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
