Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
