The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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