she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
OPIZZABONMYDICK
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
