Tell her she can't have a vagina
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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