We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
