Porn is love you can see.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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