She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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