kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
