I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
