I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
