i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
This can only be settled by a dance off.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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