I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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