have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
This is classic penis vs brain.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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