3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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