the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
