it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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