This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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