I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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