Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
