and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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